Thursday, June 15, 2006
Lessons Learned Playing Computer RPGS
So here are some lessons I've learned playing Computer Role-Playing Games (a bit of an Oblivion slant here, as I've been playing it lately). It's amazing how much you can learn about Real Life from these games...
#1 - People will use really elaborate locks to protect their pickaxes and yarn
#2 - Strangers met in cities are usually safe. Strangers met out on the road between cities are almost always trying to kill you.
#3 - It doesn't matter if they are hungry or not - wild animals are ALWAYS agressive and attack on sight.
#4 - Wild animals also sometimes have pockets in which they carry loose change.
#5 - People really don't mind repeating themselves endlessly.
#6 - Burials are only for people who died of natural causes. If someone dies due to violence, their body will be left out in the street forever and people will just learn to ignore it.
#7 - The world may be coming to an end, the invading monsters marching in the street, and the town burning around their ears, but merchants will always have time to haggle with you over prices and will always make sure they make a profit.
#8 - But the merchants are right - you've also almost always got time to sleep, have dinner, and run errands in the midst of an immediate apocalypse.
#9 - Weapons and armor made of soft, precious metals are somehow much stronger than their more boring steel counterparts.
#10 - Perfect strangers will seek you out to ask you to run errands for them.
#11 - Monsters may all look alike, but if one of them has his own unique name, WATCH OUT!
#12 - You may be the best locksmith / lock picker in the universe, capable of facing down villains that can wipe out entire ARMIES - but there will always be some doors that are invulnerable to nuclear blasts and completely impossible to unlock without the correct key.
#13 - Nobody has a problem with you searching through (or even smashing) barrels and crates if they aren't inside someone's house (and sometimes even if they are).
#14 - Barrels are great places to store gold coins and suits of armor.
#15 - An enemy can fire an unlimited number of arrows at you in spite of having only five arrows in their quiver. It's like a pointy, hostile loaves-and-fishes miracle.
#16 - The cashier of any store is willing to buy your pocket-lint from you for half retail price.
Got any more fun lessons you've learned? Lets hear 'em!
Labels: Game Design, Mainstream Games, retro
- posted by The Rampant Coyote @ 11:00 PM (Permalink)
Comments:
Links to this post:
<< Home
It's okay to sit on the street in front of a vendor crafting new and interesting things out stacks of stuff you just bought. The vendor is happy to buy your freshly manufactured goods right back (at the aforementioned half retail price).
The guy who goes around constantly refilling all the torchs in the dungeon with his infinite supply of fuel is never around when you are.
# posted by 
: June 16, 2006 5:00 PM
: June 16, 2006 5:00 PM
Every tomb is inevitably haunted by the ghosts of its inhabitants, graverobbers, graverobbers turned vampires or (most likely) some combination of all of the above.
News travels instantly. So fast, in fact, that word of your grand adventures reach the farthest points of the world as soon as you step out of whatever goblin-infested cavern you were in. Oh, and that wandering citizen you killed in the forest of 'no one ever goes here'? Yeah, the guards know about that.
Speaking of which, everyone has a price, especially guards. For a few pieces of gold, you can buy your way out of even the most dastardly crimes.
News travels instantly. So fast, in fact, that word of your grand adventures reach the farthest points of the world as soon as you step out of whatever goblin-infested cavern you were in. Oh, and that wandering citizen you killed in the forest of 'no one ever goes here'? Yeah, the guards know about that.
Speaking of which, everyone has a price, especially guards. For a few pieces of gold, you can buy your way out of even the most dastardly crimes.
LOL! I always laugh about the torches in dungeons. This tomb has been sealed for centuries, or so they say... so those must be magical torches that last forever and haven't consumed all the oxygen yet.
And the speed-of-light gossip! I love it when the townspeople know more about what you just accomplished than you do.
Another couple:
* One night's rest is all it takes for nearly-lethal, grevious wounds to be completely gone.
*It rarely matters how time-critical some task is - there's always time to stop, take a nap, buy supplies, maybe go on a trip to another city, do some side quests, etc. The kidnapper won't have gotten far in that time.
And the speed-of-light gossip! I love it when the townspeople know more about what you just accomplished than you do.
Another couple:
* One night's rest is all it takes for nearly-lethal, grevious wounds to be completely gone.
*It rarely matters how time-critical some task is - there's always time to stop, take a nap, buy supplies, maybe go on a trip to another city, do some side quests, etc. The kidnapper won't have gotten far in that time.
Ok,
Somewhere in the game you need to have a swarm of gnats or flies drop a suit of plate armor when killed (flyswatter, noxious gases...) I ALWAYS laughed when that happened in Diablo 2.
Somewhere in the game you need to have a swarm of gnats or flies drop a suit of plate armor when killed (flyswatter, noxious gases...) I ALWAYS laughed when that happened in Diablo 2.
but when the Lizard Men start dropping frilly dresses, perhaps it's better not to ask...
# posted by : August 28, 2007 6:24 PM
: August 28, 2007 6:24 PM
As I posted on Shamus Young's website, plus a couple more...
-An alarmingly large number of people are more than happy to welcome a group of strange, heavily armed intruders into their home, and will often ask them to perform personal errands for them. (see Baldur's Gate)
-Every building has been designed by the Time Lords- waaaay bigger on the inside than the outside. (see- any Black Isle game)
-Messengers and the like must be really high level. If the heroes have to fight through forests containing bandits, jungles containing lizard monsters and dungeons full of demons/undead/other nameless horrors, just to get to the next town, then so must anyone popping over to visit their relatives. (see- Dungeon Siege)
-Female spellcasters are immune to the cold. (see- Icewind Dale)
-Every foe and challenge you encounter is precisely powerful enough to be defeated by you, but not so weak as to be defeated easily. (see- Any game really)
-People delivering supplies to towns and the like are never late. If they aren't on time, then monsters got them. Always. (see- Icewind Dale and a bunch of other stuff)
Post a Comment
-An alarmingly large number of people are more than happy to welcome a group of strange, heavily armed intruders into their home, and will often ask them to perform personal errands for them. (see Baldur's Gate)
-Every building has been designed by the Time Lords- waaaay bigger on the inside than the outside. (see- any Black Isle game)
-Messengers and the like must be really high level. If the heroes have to fight through forests containing bandits, jungles containing lizard monsters and dungeons full of demons/undead/other nameless horrors, just to get to the next town, then so must anyone popping over to visit their relatives. (see- Dungeon Siege)
-Female spellcasters are immune to the cold. (see- Icewind Dale)
-Every foe and challenge you encounter is precisely powerful enough to be defeated by you, but not so weak as to be defeated easily. (see- Any game really)
-People delivering supplies to towns and the like are never late. If they aren't on time, then monsters got them. Always. (see- Icewind Dale and a bunch of other stuff)
# posted by : August 29, 2007 5:15 AM
: August 29, 2007 5:15 AMLinks to this post:
<< Home
